ljapaneseguml

whatever happened to that show 'the critic'?

  i ran a mile today. i was listening to daft punk's harder, better, faster, stronger and i got the huuuge rush of energy. it was greaattt! earlier this semester i was supposed to go to the gym with vincent and adam, but i always seemed to eat or take showers at the wrong time. but now that i know for sure, again, that i can run a mile without stopping, i'm so down for going whenever.
i never write in this thing anymore. for a while, i was a little addicted to it.
anyway.
yeah. i'm tired and i should start doing some homework. i'm behind. again.
*peacesign*

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i'm watching the simpsons. this is very weird for being a huge fan of family guy.

if i don't cross, i'm definitely moving to louisiana.
it's a for sure thing.
that's all i'm updating on for now.

 this future talk isn't going to go well.
she is malicious
she doesn't understand
she's spiteful
and nothing pisses me off more
it's kind of like that song
spite & malice by placebo.
two of my favorite words.
ugh. whatever.
people suck.
[note: the last/this entry is not related to anyone i've recently met. these friendships have been there for a while now. please keep in mind.]
so now.
i'm going to have breakfast [or brunch] with one of my favorite people.
peace mane. 

mk so we're back together. this will be interesting. i'm looking forward to it.

randomness.
i wish everyone would just put shit aside, realize people made mistakes, and get along again.
actions based on malicious intent pisses me off more than anything, and i wish they would grow up.
i like being the messenger when it's for a good cause. this future talk better go well.
i love my closest friends here more than anything and all i want to do is see them truly happy.
i love my best friend angel in louisiana, i get to see her for mardi gras.
i love my air and kellie. they're genuine. and make me laugh like no one else.
and i love louie. i really don't want to see his penis.


i think i'll watch night at the roxbury.

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i'm pretty sure brad is the only person i know who responds to everything i say with something that will keep the conversation going. he is the coolest person i know. we met when i was only in 5th grade. i love that guy. a lot. and i wish more people were like him.

[sigh]. i have fallen in love with miranda. i realized that this morning. maybe last night. but yes. i have fallen in love with her.
miranda.
she's sweet. she loves me. she makes me laugh. she deals with all of my bickering. she accepts that i don't trust her, but still tries to get it back. she wants to be with me and only me. we both start fights for the thrill.
but she fucked a guy i hate most while i was in the house. and she ignores my calls and texts. and she cheats on me with my "best friend". and she wonders why i told her "fuck you" after seeing his car outside her house. i already knew. and she doesn't tell me until i tell her i know. and she never fails to make up an excuse for everything she's done wrong. and she says "i'm seriously waking up to this shit" when i'm trying to tell her how i feel about us. and she never thinks she's made a mistake. and she ditches me to get drunk and high. there's more to life than that. and she does coke, the one drug i hate most out of all. and she's fucking only 16, still in high school. and not only is she in high school, but she doesn't apply herself and makes herself look stupid. everyone's telling me to drop her. that she doesn't deserve me. but what if i can change it? what if i'm exactly what she needs? i want to be with her again. but i want it to be the old her. she simpler her. she sweeter her. the less selfish her. i've fought for her once [i lost to an addiction. [coke]], but i'd fight again. and maybe this relationship will be longer than a week. maybe i'll be in it for the long haul. yeah. i'm going for it.

next thing.

how do i tell my parents?

shoot me. i'm pretty sure my appendix exploded. i'm useless now.

hello slight hickie.

but this song reminds me of myself towards miranda. [note: this is after everything she's ever done to me]:

with one or two i get used to the room
we go slow when we first make our moves
by five or six bring you out to the car
number nine with my head on the bar
and its sad, but true
out of cash and IOU's

i've got desperate desires and unadmirable plans
my tongue will taste of gin and malicious intent
bring you back to the bar, get you out of the cold
my sober straight face, gets you out of your clothes
and they're scared, that we know
all the crimes they'll commit
who they'll kiss before they get home

i will lie awake
lie for fun and fake the way i hold you
let you fall for every empty word i say

barely conscious in the door where you stand
your eyes are fighting sleep while
your mouth makes their demand
you laugh at every word
trying hard to be cute
i almost feel sorry for what i'm gonna do
and your hair smells of smoke
who will cast the first stone?
you can sin or spend the night all alone

brass buttons on your coat hold the cold,
in the shape of a heart that they cut out of stone
you're using all your looks that you've thrown from the start
if you let me have my way, i swear i'll tear you apart
cause it's all you can be
you're a drunk
and your scared
its ladies night, all the girls drink for free

i will lie awake
lie for fun and fake the way i hold you
let you fall for every empty word i say

i will lie awake
lie for fun and fake the way i hold you
let you fall for every empty word i say

i will lie awake
lie for fun and fake the way i hold you
let you fall for every empty word i say

alright guys. so i'm back in denton and the first person i notice is my compVince :) it felt really good for him to be my first hug because we're just so good at giving them, and when you find two people who give really good hugs and put them together, it's heaven :) i saw louie working his desk shift, checked my mom in, and my compVince carried my basket up to my room with me :) aww he's so sweet. that's why he's my compVince. so right when my mom drops off my stuff, she decides to leave me :( she never stays with me. dad does :/ ah man. speaking of my dad. living with him was way better than i anticipated. i loved living in oakcliff and working at domingo's. i don't think i've ever had such a hurtful goodbye with co-workers. i didn't care for on the border. leaving new york was easy cause i said i'd be back [which, i didn't go back, not on purpose though], but domingo's? ... man. it makes me really sad. i met some awesome people there. amazing people. i can't wait to go back this summer.
on a happier note. actually i don't know if it's happy. it's just funny. or resembles fun times.
i can tell this semester is going to be awesome. i went with compVince to his room and i found fuzzy handcuffs! so i cuffed him to myself and we went down to the front desk to do some pda. i don't know what that has to do with this semester going well, but i've befriended more people and my air and i are closer than ever.
so many nicknames. actually, just two mentioned in this. breakdown. my air: angelica who is pretty much my best friend in this place. compVince: vincent who is my "it's complicated" on facebook. it's really complicated between us. one: he's gay. i go both ways. we're exclusive, but we see other people. we don't want each other to see other people, but we go on dates and stuff. oh. and we're engaged. but we're not together or anything. know what i'm talking about?
OH MAN! i saw the last half of i am legend! ahhh. it wasn't too bad. i kind of liked it. a bit intense.
so it's almost 8. i wanted to take a shower, but there's two small fridges in the tub so the ice could drain out over the break. suck. i remember how dirty the tub was last semester and i had to clean it and stuff. i don't want to do it again. la'hame.
so. this entry became longer than what i wanted. i'm hungry. where's louie to take me to eat.

nothing gets on my nerves more than people who get all mushy in relationships and start making up pet names.
jeezus. fucking lame. LAME.
makes me want to vomit.

ANYWAY


it's work time.
this saturday i get to see my air, louie, my compVince, and other twu friends.
i'm exciteeeeed! :D

sooo school starts next week. i'm not going to like my schedule. it's completely fucked up. LAAAAAAME. i don't even want to tell it. it's embarrassing. i should start registering earlier. BLEH. anyway. i'm excited to see all of my denton friends. i miss old 19th floor buddies and new friends i've made.
moving on
i saw one missed call last night. meeehhhh. it's ok.
i don't think i feel like writing.

p.s. louie misses me. i know it :)

edit://
oh yeah. miranda and i broke up. again.
i never learn.

i wish i had a lover who looked like this




fuuuuck i love shaaane

someone get her for me

for those who know sebastian [i think it's only louie], i finally got to talk to him on the phone last night. he got to call his family for christmas. it was so weird knowing he's alive and out there somewhere. i almost forgot how he sounded :( i really miss him. i can't wait until he comes back. we're going to stay up late swapping manly stories and in the morning, i'm making waffles :) [sigh] but until then, i'll sit here at my desk at work, comiendo un burrito de huevo con tocino. mmm :) that A in spanish needs to start showing. i guess i should practice. bleh. well. it's time for work. boo. everyone have a good day.

i still want to cry [facebook], but i would like to say i am very happy at the moment :) :) :) my friend carlos is coming home from boot camp/"schooling" with the navy. i haven't seen him since about the third week of school. i'm so exciteeeed :) :) :) :) :) :) :) i'll probably pull a briana and rape him or something. good times. good times. so right now, i'm pretty sure louie's having a stroke and briana/compVince are still fighting over my brother. interesting lives. well. i have to shower because mother is picking me up at ten so i can see the navy guy. i hope everyone [the five friends i have on here] are having good winter breaks and are working hard for that money. you know, so you can pay for books and stuff when school starts again. toodles.





did i really just say toodles?

work was greeeat :)

p.s.
briana's in love with my brother.

i want her to be my sister-in-law :)

hmm. so today is my first day of work with dad. i'm living with him in oakcliff [something i thought i'd never do] and working for domingo garcia [another thing i thought i'd never do]. i hate going into work not knowing what the heck i'll be doing, but i'm going in there today with NO CLUE whatsoever on what i'm supposed to do/what my job really is [or means], thus, i am nervous. terrified actually. pray for me. i might not come home alive.

nothing makes me happier than daft punk in the morning

 scene: in a car, ouside of jack-in-a-box around 11pm
[i'm the only sober one]
dad: give me my taco
*i start digging through the bag*
*jason opens the glove compartment and starts looking through it*
dad: what are you doing?
jason: looking for my food
dad: you didn't order any food. close the glove compartment
jason: oh ok. *shuts compartment* valerie, give dad my taco

i love it when my family's drunk.
i get to take care of them.
<3

p.s. my phone's working again :) 


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i turned on the tv
and started watching this
it creeped me the hell out